Not Talking

From the medical thought leaders of Man Francisco, Not Talking is an approved treatment for a wide variety of social ails. It's safe and effective for use in many situations, costs less than a cup of coffee, and has long-lasting benefits to your personal life. So what are you waiting for? Ask your doctor if Not Talking is right for you.

Are you a candidate?

Not Talking is not recommended for couples or those in an intimate relationship, or for friends who have accidentally wronged each other.

When used correctly, side effects include: nothing! You'll be fine. In fact, you can still hear the sound of your own voice whenever you want, from inside the comfort of your own home.

Not Talking can be used...

  • In person
  • While participating in public online forums
  • As a replacement for direct messages
  • In all forms of social media
  • At events, audiences, live Q&A sessions, and more!

Shut The Fuck Up

Shut the Fuck Up is approved by the MFDA as an emergency contraceptive for uncontrollable feelings towards people and situations you do not understand but nonetheless remind you of your own shortcomings. Shut the Fuck Up is fast-acting and effective. Talk to your doctor if symptoms continue longer than people can put up with you.

Chill The Fuck Out

Chill the Fuck Out is considered safe and effective. From the makers of Not Talking, Chill the Fuck Out can be taken by men of all ages. Do not under any circumstances offer Chill the Fuck Out to a woman. If you do offer a woman Chill the Fuck Out, seek shelter immedately in the nearest dumpster.